Why a mentor-mentee relationship is so important
Photo by Desola Lanre-Ologun on Unsplash
I joined First AML as a Software Engineer fresh out of university. I had majored in Computer Science, and while I knew that university and work were very different, I thought, “Hey, at least I’m doing something related to my degree so it can’t be that different right?” Wrong 😅 After a few weeks of Googling and inundating senior Software Engineers with all my questions, I was starting to doubt my abilities. Massive Imposter Syndrome was creeping up 🥲
It quickly became clear to me that I needed to take action. I knew that other tech companies, especially the larger ones, had dedicated mentorship programmes for their graduate employees, so I decided to propose this idea to my manager and VP. They were fully onboard! I had a discussion with one of the seniors and they agreed to be my mentor. Perfect! 🥳
How to form a mentor-mentee relationship
The next steps were establishing the mentor-mentee relationship. We discussed:
Individual goals
This included short-, mid-, and long-term goals. A mentor-mentee relationship should be a two way street and, as such, we had an open discussion about what each of us wanted out of this arrangement. As a mentee, learning and growing was my goal so I came up with a bunch of technical areas I wanted to get up to speed in. My mentor wanted to practise explaining advanced technical concepts in a simple way, improve their mentoring abilities more generally and, in doing these two things, find any holes in their technical mental models. For example, it’s one thing to know React will re-render, but it’s another to know why it re-renders.
Boundaries and expectations
We established that the purpose of the mentorship programme was to focus on meta topics and creating accurate mental models of technical concepts. It was not for unblocking any day-to-day work. The idea was that with all the learnings from the mentoring sessions, over time, I would have enough knowledge to be able to unblock myself.
Structure
For these dedicated mentoring sessions, we decided that one hour per week on a Friday worked best for us. During the initial months, we also had a check-in every 4 weeks to reflect on how the programme was going, give each other feedback, and make any necessary meta improvements.
Session agenda
We agreed that having a meeting agenda was very important for us. Throughout the week, I would note down any questions that popped up. I would aim to get all of the questions down by EOD Thursday so that my mentor could prepare in advance. One of the most important things to be aware of when forming a mentor-mentee relationship is to respect each other’s time, particularly the senior mentor who is often time-poor. Preparing the meeting agenda beforehand ensures that both parties will maximise their value from these sessions.
Benefits of having a mentor-mentee relationship
We have had this mentorship programme running for around a year now, and it has been an absolute game-changer.
From a mentee perspective
From a mentee perspective, I have found it incredibly beneficial to have an experienced Software Engineer as a mentor to learn from. We have been able to discuss and clarify mental models which have strengthened my understanding of concepts; I have been able to learn tips and practices that may not be “Googleable” and would have probably taken me years to discover; I have been able to learn from his career experiences and journey.
My technical skills and knowledge have also improved tremendously compared to when I first started out, and it has been very encouraging to be able to see and feel this difference. For example, I am not blocked as frequently anymore, or even if I am, I can unblock myself, and that is because of the correct mental models I have now. Ultimately, it is also really good for the company, because work gets done faster! The biggest testament to my growth so far has been my recent promotion to Software Development Engineer 2 in just 9 months! This definitely would not have been possible without the support of my mentor and colleagues.
From a mentor perspective
I asked my mentor what they gained from the relationship, and here’s what they had to say:
“Learning how to explain complicated topics in a simple way is a critical skill for advancing past senior. This mentorship (and the honest feedback loop we’ve established) has helped hone that skill.”
“Sometimes it’s hard to know what I don’t know. Mentoring really highlights those gaps in knowledge or mental models. I can then fill that gap through research - in particular learning about the topic with my mentee so they can see how I go about learning / Googling too.”
“In my opinion, mentoring in software development should be more than teaching technical concepts or providing technical guidance. There are a plethora of meta topics surrounding the job which are important to explicate - such as career progression, remuneration expectations and outside-of-work coding. These are critical soft skills for a mentor to develop alongside their technical coaching abilities. Mentoring has helped immensely with this development.”
“Making a habit of sharing new and interesting learnings, in an accessible way, has definitely helped me cement those learnings in long term memory. There’s nothing quite like explaining something in your own words when it comes to long term memory retention.”
One thing to note is that since software is inherently opinionated and opinions vary wildly, it is important for the mentee to supplement their learnings from their mentor by continuing to engage with other software engineers for their opinions. This allows for a well-rounded, unbiased perspective and also fosters healthy relationships with everyone in the team.
Conclusion
It’s been a year since I joined First AML (in fact I just had my 1-year work anniversary! 🥳) and there is no doubt about how invaluable this mentor-mentee relationship has been. It’s contributed much to my growth and that of my mentor. No matter your level of seniority, I believe there is always knowledge to exchange across levels. So, get out there and become a mentor, mentee or both! Your career will thank you.
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